Becoming the Person You Were Meant to Be - Part 1

Have you ever had the feeling that you were justsociety or your mother think.
"looking and acting the part" in your work life? OrVision-based Choice and Decisions. In the purposeful
that somehow you were doing activities that playedlife, you make decisions from a place of balanced
to your weaknesses and left you feeling drained? Orvision and can measure any decision against whether
maybe even that "if everyone would just do what Ior not it is taking you toward or away from your
need them to...." it would all be easier and better?vision.
First of all, if you have, you are not alone. As anPriority-driven scheduling to build balance. Finally, with
executive coach, I hear many of my clients expressa strong personal vision, you drive your schedule,
these feelings at different points in their lives. Someyour schedule does not drive you. You put the things
of the symptoms of this type of disconnectthat really matter in your plan, and you begin to
between "the real you" and the "you at work" are:eliminate the things that do not increase your energy
Overwhelm and Rush. You always have too much toand your ability to achieve the vision.
do, and never enough time to do it, and keeping allI have outlined 10 steps to building a career and life
those balls in the air is wearing you out. If you couldaround who you were meant to be, not necessarily
just add a few more hours to the day it would allwho you think you are expected to be. In a coaching
work out...relationship, these are some of the steps we work
Urgency overload. Everything is important and has toon, and although you can do these things on your
be done now, and even small issues feel like majorown, having a coach to help you through makes the
crises.process deeper, faster and brings tangible results
"Silver bullet" mentality, or "next week/month/year Iearlier. Of the 10 steps, the first one is:
will be in control...". This can easily become a pattern1. Stop the Roller-coaster and Focus on You
in your life where there is always going to be time toIn order to change the way you feel and behave and
enjoy your life after the next (big contractbecome the best person you can be in your business
promotion/raise/startup/joint venture/client). It will alland also in your personal life, you have to begin by
be better as soon as....set aside time to examine yourself and your situation
Externally-driven Goals and Priorities. This looks likeand take the steps required to make permanent
striving for goals and focusing on priorities that willchange. This is not a 15-minute exercise, either, but
garner external recognition, like a title, an incomerather a long-term commitment to valuing yourself
level, an award - because of what other people willand your unique contributions, desires and goals.
think of you when you get there.If you think you don't have time for this, or you
The worst part is that these symptoms tend todon't have time for this "right now", look back at the
feed one another, and you can find yourself in alist of "Driven Life" characteristics and realize that you
spiral of stress very quickly. I call this the "Drivencan be stuck in this pattern for life unless you find a
Life".way to make a change now, because now is all there
But, there is an alternative I call the "Purposeful Life",is.
and its symptoms include:In fact, this exercise of becoming the business
Long-Term Focus on Fundamentals. This meansperson you were meant to be can be started in a
looking out into the future and working on things thatfew hours, but to create meaningful change, I
form the foundation for achieving your long-termsuggest you give yourself a year to allow your logical
vision.and emotional minds to collaborate on your vision of
Internally-driven Goals and Priorities. This meansyourself, and to fully integrate new thinking and new
setting and prioritizing goals that are based on yourhabits in a sustainable way. Plan on at least a couple
personal vision, not based on externally orof hours a week over a few months to start. Build
"system"-driven criteria for success or achievement.this time into your schedule - what work could be
What is really important to you, regardless of whatmore important?